Christmas vacation has arrived for me. I am off for two weeks. These weeks are shaping up to be rainy and grey. Not the best conditions to enjoy the great outdoors as I planned to do. It’s been a week and a half of rain already and I am so longing for a patch of blue sky however brief. Time to get Happy Light out of the box.
If it wasn’t for my pooch I would spend all my time at home with a book during the day and a movie at night. But that routine is rudely interrupted by a needy companion who indeed has his own agenda for the Holidays: walks, walks, more walks and mouse hunting. So, as it is the days are filled with the sound of the dryer and wet footwear.
When it wasn’t rainy I was listening to podcasts while he gets his hunting on. I listened to “Deconstructed” — a political series with a lot of interesting guests who are deep into political situations around the world. I hate politics and don’t read newspapers as there is A. no good news, B. there is nothing I can personally do to change it, C. I experience pure rage at the situation in the US (who does not?). But that podcast caught my attention for the simple fact that Bernie Sanders and Noam Chomsky were some of the guests. I like listening to people who are much smarter than me even if the conversation rotates around politics.
I have a few get-togethers coming up and feel like I should put my happy face around people who I care about. An obligation to make the interactions more enjoyable for everyone especially during holidays. The only downside is that I have to come home after that and feel loneliness. It is the only time I experience that feeling. The rest of the time I am happy with solitude. I’ve read somewhere that in order to be happy you have to get comfortable to be by yourself. It has changed my outlook on being alone. Being alone is not being lonely for me. Being alone is writing, doing art, hiking, walking, running, knitting, reading, and all other activities that aloneness allows you to do. I am seldom bored.
I am ready to say goodbye to 2019 as it was filled with injuries and blisters that seem to come from nowhere. So I patiently await the December 31st to come through my door. Champagne and good riddance along with new wishes will be present as well as good company, good food and wine (of course). It’s good to see the glimmer of an end. It makes you hopeful for a change and a “new, better” life however utopian it is. So, I wait.