I have not written for a while not because I did not have time, more because I had nothing to say. Sometimes life is like that. Your brain is just not producing many thoughts on any matter. I hate these time. They make me feel catatonic and stupid. Not a self-flagellation, just how it feels. The world is wondrous and so is everything in it. You forget sometimes that there are always new things to see, learn, experience. You get so caught up with the stupid minutiae, the mundane, the ugly that you forget just how wondrous the world is. And that’s when you have nothing to say.
It’s amazing really how your brain actually protects you.Well, sometimes anyway. It wraps you in this cocoon of un-thoughts. It’s like a warm blanket or a wet blanket that smells rotten depending on the circumstances. At other times it sends you on a loop of the mundane and minutiae and it feels like you cannot get out of it. Thoughts keep spinning but they are thought not worth mentioning, not worth writing about. Then you feel stupid.
I am finishing up a course, trying to complete my Master’s degree. The course is about digital storytelling, but really it’s about storytelling in general because the story is a story, regardless of the medium, regardless of pathways. We, humans, are tied to the storytelling. Our lives are stories. Some are still waiting to happen, some have happened already. So when you start feeling like you have anything to say it feels like your life stops. Of course, it does not. It just feels like it.
But back to life being wonderous. Sometimes it throws you an opportunity for change. Some gurus who say the change is in you-you just have to recognize it and take small steps to make it. But I think circumstances rule there. You have to be in a right state of mind (not catatonic) to recognize the opportunity, to open your eyes and see and feel that life is wonderous and is giving you an opportunity. It has nothing to do with strong will. That comes in later after you recognize the opportunity for change. Then you can think of what it will take to get there and do it (or not). That’s post catatonic and stupid. It is almost an after-effect of that. And it generally happens unexpectedly. Hense the “revelation.”