Today’s task was to “ask Bill Gates for money.” Miraculously the book provided his address: c/o Bill Gates, Microsoft, Redmond, WA 98052 (in case you would like to also ask him for money). I still have stamps left from another task so it is easy to mail without a trip to the post office. The book suggested including your bank details but there is no way in hell as Microsoft probably has a number of hackers and that just spells disaster. Instead, I opted for making a check to cash or a money order. Let him go to the post office and experience what the rest of us simple/humble humans experience.
Anyway, here is the letter I wrote to him:
“Dear Bill, I am Tatiana–a published author in This Book Will Save Your Life Again–my proud and witty accomplishment. From that, you might deduce that I am talented. As of right now, it’s a tough life and I can use more dough. Here is my offer: if you give me a couple of million out of your 26 billion fortune (which is a drop in your bucket of money) I will mention you when I write a research paper for work. Being included in an academic paper is an honor. Take it as a liberal art project. For another 500,000 I will include your photo printed in color. It’s a pretty sweet deal and I think you will agree. Please make a check to cash or provide a money order. Yours gratefully, Tatiana. PS: I am an Apple girl but I think Apple is too stingy so I will bring myself liking your software.
Now I wait for oodles of money and if I get it I am not sharing. Yep, I suck.
