Today’s task was to “go on a one-man protest.” well, for me it was “one-woman’s” At first I thought I’d just make a sign “I deserve better” and stand on a corner of my street. But then I thought what if someone reports it to my HOA. Really don’t want to deal with them as the last time I dealt with them was at their budget meeting that I crushed. They told me not to ask questions before they were done and I was not happy with it as in the end, I might have not remembered all the questions I had (and there were many). So, I totally went against the rule and inserted my questions as the meeting went. They had no choice but to answer even if they were assholic about it. Anyhow… So I decided to stage the protest in front of my dog. Here is how it went (I created a card and glued it to an ice cream stick): “My dearly beloved even if I love you with all my heart I have pet peeves (pun intended). Why don’t we switch to less costly treats? You are ruining my savings! Why don’t not wait for me to open my car door twice for you to get in? That really makes me look crazy in front of the neighbors. On a hike why don’t you just go miles as you do in the city instead of going a mile and then wanting to turn back? Nature is beautiful but I do understand that there is no place for you to do your business as you are respectful of the trails. What is it about walkways in the city that you like and what I don’t understand? When I give you kisses on your nose why don’t you reciprocate? My nose is ready for the kisses as well. Why are you so stubborn to our wonderful housesitter? Is it because she has no patience for you to make your own way? Jumping on the bed with me is fine but nudging me out of bed is not. And finally, why don’t you only eat particular bully sticks and not all? Thank god I can send the leftovers to my friend. Spoiled much?” That was it. Otherwise, I have a perfect doggo for me. Mellow Yellow. He of course did not take any of this into account and tried to eat the ice cream stick as he still smelled it. Well, it was the end of my protest. My dog is an asshole.
