Wednesday

4.11.18

petal

I haven’t written for a while because I was trying to finish up my graduate degree. Now that it’s over and I passed comprehensive exams (which I have to say I am proud of) the writing starts again. Writing is a curious thing as when you stop for a while it is harder to start again on a specific note or even mood. It is not like riding a bicycle. You have to ease into it again. It is at least like that for me.

I love writing and I hate it at the same time. When I am out of practice, it takes a long time to write even 20 lines. It continues for a while until I get in the groove again. It is also helpful to integrate it into the pattern of your life, your days, your routine. Hopefully, I will get there soon.

Right now my mind is on a freeze. I think it is still recovering from the copious amounts of academic writing I had to do recently. Different pattern, different words. The new words still do not come easily.

Now that school is over for me my life reverted to a familiar pattern of working, running, walking the dog, and occasionally baking. If it wasn’t for the never-ending rain I would be hiking. I miss the openness of the ocean and the canopies of trees. Various projects that I dreamed of starting or finishing still did not become reality yet. I suppose it is like writing, you have to ease into it. Do what you can do today and not tomorrow does not work for me yet. Although I try.

I do have a new thing that I do. It’s rather silly. I buy a lottery ticket once a week. I know I kid myself, but I am thinking that somebody wins and it might as well be me. Who knows. I am not exceptionally lucky in life although I have been fortunate many times in my life. Having a ticket in your wallet allows for a certain degree of day-dreaming as oppose to having it be absent. It’s a false sense of hope. In spite of that, it is a rather pleasant experience as you fantasize about what your life might look like when you are financially independent. The job will go away for sure. There will be travel, a house, a charity supporting the arts. You have to have at least one noble cause, otherwise, you are selfish and just hoarding the money. I wish for millions.

 

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