Today’s task was to apply for the jobs you have absolutely no chance of getting. here is my list: Fire Inspection Coordinator– I know how sprinkles work Sales Representative Entry Level – Work From Home — tempting as I would love staying on working from home Assistant Signal Person — have no idea what it is but I put my…
Today’s task was to borrow something from your neighbor the stranger the better. I had options: A rotten egg — no way. I would not be able to stand the smell. Key to the kingdom — no interest in this either. I have my own kingdom to rule. It is called Passive Aggresiva and I am their queen. 999 grains…
Today’s task was to rage against the machine. The book provided the machines. I provided the commentary: Rage against the toaster — did it this morning. “You’ve burnt it again! Raaaaaaggghhh!!! Rage against the kettle — also this morning as I was trying to have tea. “Boil you fucker, boil!!!! Rage against the elevator — I had to take one…
Today’s task was to “praise an unsung achievement.” So I decided on 3 (one politically incorrect as most of the society hates them but I saw them in action so there.) 1. Neighbor: I posted a note on his door. This is what it said (true to the core in regards to him). “Dear neighbor. Sorry to bother you with…
Today’s task was to generate your own barcode. The book gave examples of some famous people with barcodes: Michael Jackson Tom Hanks Salman Rushdie Celine Dion Oprah Winfrey Elton John Yoko Ono I am proud to join their ranks. Well, some of them. Don’t care much for Celine or Oprah. I don’t want to see your millions worth which of…
Today’s task was to learn how to tie a knot. First I had to determine why. Here is what I thought: Escape from fire. escape from kidnapping. Tie up a maniac until the police arrive. Tie yourself to a tree during the tornado. I learned a single wall knot: Unlay the ends of the rope, and form A bight with…
Today’s task was to “presell your memoirs based on my spectacular future achievements” So, I mailed the letter to an address provided by the book: 12a Wyman Park Drive, Somerset, NJ 08872 This is the letter (kind of a long read): Dear publisher, This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for you to buy my memoirs. I am Tatiana and you have…
Today’s task was to prepare for the world’s end. According to “Church of Holy Rapture,” the world’s end will happen at midnight Israeli time. Which means 2 pm PST. It is 2 pm on the dot as I write this task. I had to make all the necessary preparations. However, if I am still alive after 2 pm I have…
Today’s task was to speak only Esperanto. I had to carry my book with me because I totally could not remember all the lines at first but then I memorized them after a while. I had many opportunities on the walk with Opee and instead of saying Hello, I threw Esperanto at them. This resulted in them asking very slowly…
