Today’s task was to “wreak havoc on a microscopic scale.” The task is as follows: 1. Shake hands with someone and spread armies of staphylococcus — It’s raining today and my freakazoid doggo won’t go on a walk unless I drive him somewhere where he has no choice but to walk during the rain. Thank god the roads are OK…
Today’s task was to “think of the brand you could be a great spokesperson for. Contact them and become rich.” So the book gave me suggestions but I ignored them as I did not know any brands they recommended. See if you recognize any: • Zappot (apparently removes spots from your face. I prefer to age gracefully spots included). •…
Today’s task was to borrow something from your neighbor the stranger the better. I had options: A rotten egg — no way. I would not be able to stand the smell. Key to the kingdom — no interest in this either. I have my own kingdom to rule. It is called Passive Aggresiva and I am their queen. 999 grains…
Today’s task was to prepare for the world’s end. According to “Church of Holy Rapture,” the world’s end will happen at midnight Israeli time. Which means 2 pm PST. It is 2 pm on the dot as I write this task. I had to make all the necessary preparations. However, if I am still alive after 2 pm I have…
Today’s task was to “pretend you are a secret agent.” The book provided instructions for covert operations: “No one can know. Your government needs you, they are watching. Meet at 1300 today outside work. Wave at a gray car. It will pick you up and take you to a secret rendezvous. Good luck. Tear this page out and swallow it.”…
Today is Muzak day. My task was to carry your desired ambiance around you. Choose songs for every mood you have.” Moods: Angry — Mutter, Ramstein (always a pleasure to hear them. I even incorporated their remix in my set when I was DJing); Injustice for all, Metallica (do I need to say more?); White America, Eminem (I really like…
today’s task was to “test a proverb today and determine its usefulness.” the book provided the proverbs for my selection. 1. The best things in life are free — hello fancy workshops at my work where dinner and wine are provided. yes!!! super useful (as any funeral with casseroles). 2. Revenge is sweet — for sure. I took one with…
Today’s task was “make people notice you.” The book gave me a variety of examples of what to do. For example, keep one eye shut today — hard to walk with that one. I tried and almost hit my pinky toe on the table leg. Spread money around — who carries cash anymore? Carry a midget under your left arm…
Today’s task was to “find your namesake and write them a letter”. Well, this one was bonkers as I Googled my name in hopes to find the namesake and experienced no luck so I decided to celebrate me instead. Came up with weird information. Turns out I lived in two churches. This was a first as I don’t believe in…
Today’s task was to leave a note on someone’s car windshield. Luckily I went to a store to get some orange juice (I drink copious amounts of it ever since I got sick). I had to handwrite it as I don’t have a printer at home. But I thought it will look like a traffic ticket. And I could totally…
