Today’s task was to “join the political party.” Here is what I think: Republicans: Capitalism Rules. Death Penalty. Abortions are illegal. We are the rich. Democrats: Whatever. We go with the flow. Communists: The Soviet system was not all bad. Redistribution of wealth (total lie but sure). Kill the rich (which they did). Green Party: Corporations are evil. Save the…
Today’s task was to “bury a treasure.” First, I had to identify what I want to bury. I decided on my Haruki Murakami collection (pic included) because I am running out of space on my bookshelf (the books are stacked twice on each shell). My thought was that in 20 years I can unbury it and read it again. The…
Today is the “conspiracy day.” So, due to my laziness in spring cleaning, I hired (for the first time ever) a cleaning lady. I left the house because I thought it was rude to observe her and that would make her uncomfortable. I did leave the list of things I wanted to get done. Took two pages because it is…
Today’s task was to “pretend you are pregnant day.” Here is what I did: Stuffed a pillow under my undergarments. Went to walk Opee holding my hand behind my back and walking at a slow pace. (Opee was so not happy with that). Some woman asked me if she can touch my stomach (I kid you not!)). I did not…
Today’s task was “to work out what your dreams are telling you to do and do it.” Well, here is my dreamland (I looked it up): 1. Clouds — there are problems at work. go on vacation. (yey. I am so overdue!). 2. Falling — your fear of failure. Don’t do anything today. (great! I am all for not doing…
Today’s task was “to go to the nearest cemetery, cover your face with flour, and walk into town with your arms outstretched.” Well, this was a fun one. I went to the cemetery near Cornelius (30 minutes of driving but it is a beautiful cemetery). Opee was with me. As I covered myself with flour he felt inclined to lick…
Today’s task was to “mouth something obscene to a stranger.” Things I chose to mouth: 1. I’m hot for you 2. You look naughty 3. Hello horny 4. Fucky fucky sucky sucky 5. Nice ass stranger I was somewhat afraid they can actually call me on that in which case I was prepared to say, “Your shoelaces are untied.” So,…
Today’s task was to “spend $37.” Apparently, economists determined that $37 a day is the optimal figure to spend at this point to spend at the billing cycle. Do your duty for the world economy to purchase goods for $37. That was not easy as I had to add everything I purchased at Trader Jo’s and no matter how I…
Today’s task was to “shoplift something.” After closely examining examples of what to shoplift that the book offers as follows: 1. A sweet — Police caution (don’t eat sweets. A leftover from Soviet childhood where we did not have any). 2. A car — 4 years (seems too low. No? anyhow, would not fit in my pocket. Plus Fred’s does…
